:D

Happy Anniversary to Not Dating a Douchebag

It was a year ago this month that I had finally broken the strings that attached me to my old douchebag of a boyfriend, and I'm feeling more and more thankful everyday for the amazing boyfriend that God has now blessed me with... especially when I think back to what a terrible guy I was with before and how blind I was about it. I have always felt sorry for the next girl and all the things she doesn't know, but at the same time....I had to learn the hard way, just like everyone else. It's just sad that out of a 2 year relationship, the only thing I think about when I think of him is how much better the world would have been if he had never been born....so sad :(



But I love my boyfriend that I'm with now and couldn't ask for a better man with such a good heart.... I have yet to meet a person who can say, "I don't like him or I have a problem with him." He's just that amazing, and I love him for it.




I'm super excited that one week from today, Mr. Amazing himself planned a surprise trip for me, which consists of us driving to Dallas to watch the Stars play the Avalanche (my favorite sports team of all time) and then the next day going to Six Flags to ride rollar coasters all day (another one of my ALL TIME favorite things to do). And all this.... just to make me happy, there is no special occassion. But I did point out that we'll be celebrating our 4 month anniversary, which he didn't realize, lol :D

Five Years Later

I randomly came across an old blog I created when I was a teen in high school....... Similar to this one, but it was actually a diary. I created it under a fake name, with a fake profile so that nobody would find it, but if somebody wanted to.... you could.
Anyway, it was written EXACTLY 5 years ago today....... Here is an excerpt:

If it's the last thing I do.... I will never give up again with what I want. I don't care anymore, and I will never put my trust in a guy again who can't come through. I was right about ___, so I'm pretty sure I can be right about this.

"You've got to trust your instincts

And let go of regrets

You've got to bet on yourself now, star

Cuz that's your best bet"

I want to be in love with life again. I want to laugh and enjoy my senior year with my best friends. I want to let ____ know that she can't hurt me anymore. I want to be free.

Wow....... I read that and my jaw dropped. I forgot about how determined I was...how driven.... and I wonder what happened in the past five years.... I have more direction, but not that same spark. Do I need to be completely miserable for me to want to make a change?

If that's a yes....I'm pretty disappointed in who I am. But I have to say that I am extremely proud of the fact that three months later, I made everything I wanted happen.... and beyond.

El Scorcho

I love practical jokes. A lot of people shit their pants when they saw this public message:

"Dear Howl Family, The due date is June 3rd! Love, Eric and Cecilia

I can't blame anyone at work for believing the message... I think I can even barf from how adorable we are

:D

The last post was pretty intense. You have to take the good with the bad. So to prevent you all from carting me to an institution, let me help your heart rate go down with some holiday cheer. With the inspiration of Julie Andrews, here are a few of my favvvvvvvvvvvvvorite things................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Christmas in Colorado

Getting embarrassed for birthdays

Lazy Cats

$2 Tuesdays (Especially now that BJ's can in turn "suck it")

Being an absolute nerd for studying something that amazes me everyday

Of course there is more..... it's just that I've spent 30 minutes doing this when I supposedly have a final tomorrow morning. Procrastination is also one of my favorite things!

This is as random as it gets

I just cried over an ice cream scoop that I found in the kitchen when I was packing up the apartment. I am an absolutely terrible person, and I will never forgive myself for the hurt I have caused. I don't deserve to be happy and lately, only good things have been happening for me.

The dinner for the evening that has been served nightly this past week is having Guilt as a starter, than Minor Depression as the main course with a side of Self Destruction. Followed for dessert is Pity and Loathing and a good Chianti.

Ba-da-bing!

I love change. I embrace it. I find the line... and deliberately cross it whenever possible. Confidence is sexy... cockiness is not.

But what happens when you apply this to dating? You get a melting pot of trouble. It wasn't until this year of '09 that I decided to try a different approach... going for men that I'm not interested in.

Please don't laugh. I know that sounds senseless, but I started to think that maybe I was only choosing men who I thought I wanted and ignoring the great ones because they might have lacked something that I wouldn't see past a friendship. After seeing the same patterns of failed relationships....sometimes you have to try something different, maybe something would stick.

This approach has not turned out well.... I tried dating the rich-boy, the jock, the motorcycle guy, the black guy (my 1st one!), the nerd (my all time fav's to go out with).... all turned out to be disappointing. The jock is still obsessed with themselves and physical apperances, the nerd would still rather play Call of Duty than cuddle, and the rich boy doesn't take no for an answer (surprise, surprise).

Oh what's a girl to do? The best thing I can provide right now, is to provide for myself... Being myself has gotten me into more trouble and attracted more unwanted things than anything else, but I'm never going to stop being a fun-loving gal who wants to fall in love again because guys want to be difficult.